As another new year begins, I’m endeavouring to try something different and altogether counter to my natural temperament.
Instead of rushing out of the gates and storming ahead with my plans, I’m pausing (right at the start) to reflect on where I really want to go, and why. Instead of wearing my productivity levels and lengthy to-do lists like a badge of honour, I’m purposefully trying to downscale and focus on not doing everything I can do, but instead, only what Ican do. Instead of working myself to the bone, towards a date where I can rest, I’m choosing to work from a place of rest.
This might sound outlandish to some, especially if you’re still convinced that your busyness equates to your significance, but let me explain why I think this is the only really sustainable and effective way to live. Here are 3 counter-intuitive insights I’ve had that I hope will inspire you along a similar journey this year…
1. THERE WILL AWAYS BE TOO MUCH TO DO
Like the journalist, Oliver Burkeman discovered, I’ve come to appreciate that this is not a depressing thought, but a liberating one. In his own words:
“Today more than ever, there’s just no reason to assume any fit between the demands on your time – all the things you would like to do, or feel you ought to do – and the amount of time available. Thanks to capitalism, technology and human ambition, these demands keep increasing, while your capacities remain largely fixed. It follows that the attempt to “get on top of everything” is doomed. (Indeed, it’s worse than that – the more tasks you get done, the more you’ll generate.)
The upside is that you needn’t berate yourself for failing to do it all, since doing it all is structurally impossible. The only viable solution is to make a shift: from a life spent trying not to neglect anything, to one spent proactively and consciously choosing what to neglect, in favour of what matters most.”
No matter who we are, every single one of us only has a limited amount of time and emotional energy to spend. Let’s spend it on what counts.
2. DO LESS TO ACHIEVE MORE
If we’re honest and take a moment to really reflect on our lives, each of us already knows this to be true. We’ve all had moments of high-impact work that takes a relatively short amount of our time, and crushingly low-impact seasons which seem to drain us of all joy and take up an inordinate amount of time. When we do less and commit to less, we’re more effective, we make better decisions, we have more (time, energy and emotional health) to give to our loved ones, we live out our values better, we put forward our best work, and we’re altogether happier and less anxious. That’s why I’m choosing to do less, to achieve more this year.
3. SELF-CARE ISN’T SELFISH
Not all self-focus is bad. Women (moms especially) are notorious for feeling guilty for taking time to do things that fill our tanks, when there are so many responsibilities that await us. Yet when our tanks are empty, we have nothing to offer anyone else. We cannot give what we do not have. Loving others well requires loving ourselves first.
That’s it from me, how about you? Any words or resolutions you’re committed to this year? However you choose to live out this year, may it be one that is lived from rest, not for rest. And may we all discover that it is not what we do that makes us human, but who we are in the gaps in-between.
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